Anger Causes, Effects and Denial and Projection

In order to see the good in other people, we must learn to see the good in ourselves. We must also come to terms with the bad and evil in ourselves. Far from being easy, this is our lifelong battle.  The denial and projection of these feelings lend to the destruction of our ‘self’.  Anxiety and depression takes hold and cripples us.  Ironically, acknowledgement of the ‘ugly’ opens the door to love and gratitude.

Denial is a defense mechanism in which you refuse to recognize that you feel a certain emotion. Oftentimes, this is because that particular emotion goes against how you perceive yourself. It actually works against your self-view, so you suppress it.

Anger Causes and Denial Defense Mechanism

If one always thinks of himself or herself as a compassionate and loving person, the idea of being angry with or having feelings of hate or disgust toward another is contradictory to their sense of self.  Oftentimes they repress these feelings into the unconscious.  They may also start to project these denied feelings unto others, which is called projection. Projection is when you have unacceptable thoughts and feelings toward others, repress them, and then in turn begin to think others have those unacceptable thoughts and feelings toward you. It’s a vicious cycle to get into.

Denial and Projection Defense Mechanism

Suppose you see yourself as a kind and compassionate person, one incapable of being angry with someone.  When you do indeed become angry with someone whom you feel great love for, you suddenly dismiss this anger. This is a form of denial. However, this causes anger which is still floating around in your unconscious somewhere.  Over time you begin to think this person is angry with you (projection) and you don’t understand why.

Anger Effects and Projection Defense Mechanism

You cannot tolerate the initial anger, and now there is additional anger that you feel about the ‘projected’ anger. You cannot tolerate your increasing hostility toward this person and direct it inward…toward yourself. Because you cannot tolerate the guilt of being angry toward a loved one, the anger is turned inward. Scripts begin to run in your head, as you try to figure out why this person is angry with you, things telling you how you are an unlikeable or bad person. The denied negative and hostile feelings toward the person are increasingly turned inward toward yourself. These negative scripts about yourself begin to take on obsessive thought patterns. These thought patterns take a toll over time and you become depressed.  You also start to experience anxiety.  Anxiety is a first-line defensive emotion that unconsciously wards off negative feelings from coming to light.  Anxiety can become debilitating after a while.  All sorts of negative actions and behaviors develop to sooth yourself from these feelings of anxiety.

Turning in on one’s self and irrationally believing people are angry with you gives little time, energy, and hope for love and gratitude. Over time, more sophisticated defenses may start to form to ward off negative emotions one may feel. Life can become very complicated and confusing making you feel out of control of emotions.  You can become ‘stuck’ in a cyclical state of depression affecting your emotionally and physical well being. It’s for this reason that feeling good about ourselves is so important.